Dear HMI,

I am responding to your “what’s on my mind” section of the website.  I remember the first time I walked into The Hetrick-Martin Institute (HMI).  I was an anxious and scared 15 year-old.  I had problems in school and wanted to drop out because I just didn’t feel that school was a comfortable or safe place.  At the time, I was constantly being reminded that I was different.  HMI provided a space where I could be safe, comfortable, and not have to worry about whether people knew my “secret.”  For once, I could just be David.  At HMI, I started my journey towards gaining self-esteem and the realization that my goals were attainable.

Eventually, I went to the Harvey Milk School (HMS).  At the time, it was a one-room schoolhouse overlooking the Hudson River.   The roof would leak and on a winter day the walk from the train station to the school was brutal.  But the community we formed at the school, and the encouragement of Mr. G and the other teachers, kept us coming back.  I can honestly say that without the Harvey Milk School, I would not have gotten my high school diploma, and I might very well never have dealt with my own sexual identity.  

Since HMS, I have graduated from Sarah Lawrence College and worked for six years with various non-profits, particularly doing HIV prevention work and working with gay and lesbian youth in both New York and Los Angeles.  Now, I am finishing my first semester of law school at the University of Pennsylvania.  I graduated from HMS in 1993, and my hope is to graduate from Penn Law in 2007.  I just wanted to say thanks for all the work you guys are doing.  I know the work is often hard, and that the material benefits are not always the best (I too am looking forward to a career in the public interest), but the work you do makes a really big difference in many people’s lives.  

Thank you,

David

Dear HMI,

In the spring of 2001, I discovered a place that would inevitably change my life and the way I live it. That place was HMI and HMHS.  I came there a confused and scared 16-year old who had the rug, floor and pavement all pulled out from under him in a series of harsh swoops. I was deeply depressed, undergoing major familial deconstruction and the then pending loss of my mother. On top of all that, I was a fairly smart kid in an academically rigorous high school who was being singled out for being gay and not being quiet about it, and they didn’t know what to do with me. I looked for a place that did - I looked for any place that could make it better, and I found HMHS.

Truth be told, I came to HMI with the intention of attending the school, a place to be understood from 9 AM to 3 PM. I applied and vehemently followed up with them. My life was going crazy and I needed this.  I got in, and started school at Harvey Milk in September of 2001, but after 2 weeks of class I wanted out. My fellow students were unlike anyone I had ever known, and I had no intention of getting to know them. I went crying, begging to be let out, but they wouldn’t. Never before, or since, has being denied something I was so desperately sure I wanted such a good thing. I fell in love with every student, teacher, and social worker at HMI. They became my second family, which was just what I needed as I was being kicked out of my home just a month after I started at HMHS - a problem that the staff at HMI quickly helped to rectify. They helped me find a place to live; they helped me find a better way to live.

I am writing this letter from SUNY Purchase, where I am now a second year Women’s Studies major. I am often asked what life was like at HMI, and I say picture the most supportive and caring place, throw in the most unique and wholly selfless people you’ve ever met, with the strongest and most courageous kids ever, and that should just about cover what HMI/HMHS is like. And after I say that, I realize just how much that description is, for me, really the most accurate there could be and I am forever grateful.

Yours in Solidarity and Gratitude,

Arthur

Dear HMI,
 
When I was first questioning my sexual orientation at the age of 17, I heard about HMI through school.  Someone came to my high school to talk about LGBT issues. It took me a week to call for directions and operation hours. I remember I had the most scared tone in my voice for that call. It took another week for me to work up the nerve to go to the location. This was when HMI was located on West Street and you had to walk up a narrow set of stairs to get into the drop-in center.  This will be a moment I will never forget, it seemed like the stairs went on forever. I went into the facility and saw the other youth just being themselves and the staff being supportive.  Talking with the staff people was the first time I felt comfortable about my sexuality and myself in my whole life.  I joke around with the youth I work with now and call this moment the opening of my closet, coming out to myself.
 
I was involved in activities at HMI for two years before I moved to California. During that time I was able to go to The March on Washington in 1993, plan events, and help HMI move to the Astor Place location. I also met friends that I have till this day and really respect and care for. 
 
I now work for The Lesbian and Gay Community Services Center of Orange County in California.  My position is to coordinate a youth drop-in center targeting at-risk youth. The best part of my job is when a youth calls for the first time with that scared tone of voice asking about the drop-in center. Knowing I could be the first person who makes a youth feel comfortable about their sexuality or gender identity is what makes my job worth wile.
 
I know working in this field, you don't see results right away and sometimes things seem kind of hopeless. Most of the people are not even grateful for your work. I would like to take a moment and say thank you for everything you have done for me.
 
Sincerely,
Rick B.

Dear HMI,

It has been about six years since I used to come to the drop-in center. It seems like ages ago. Now, looking through your website, I remember how supportive a space HMI was. I was a questioning youth age 17.  I began going to the Young Women's Group on Fridays at the G&L Community Center. Even though then I went to HMI to hang out with friends, I realize now that there was no other place I could have gone to be with my then girlfriend. I am now finishing my Bachelor's in Business (Marketing concentration) and am in a very fulfilling relationship. Although I graduated from High School in Staten Island, I felt the warmth of genuine caring and friendship within your walls. I will always remember HMI. I plan on attaining a Master's Degree as well. God Bless all the work you are doing for the youth. Your school and programs are a great wealth to our youth and community. I regained a great deal of self-love by simply being in a space where everyone was accepted.

With best regards,

Raquel

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